Funny Vocabulary Test Answers

This page contains a selection of funny test answers relating to vocabulary, gathered from a best-selling compilation by Viking Press published under the pseudonym of Alexander Abingdon in 1931. The selected extracts, edited and rearranged, are reproduced for readers in countries where the book is in the public domain, which, to the best of our knowledge, includes Australia (because more than 70 years have passed since the book's publication and because the so-called anonymous rule applies). For other countries, please check your local copyright laws.

Ultimate VocabularyThe following selection of funny vocabulary test answers is sponsored by the popular vocabulary-building software, Ultimate Vocabulary. Use Ultimate Vocabulary to improve your vocabulary and to support this website: for every copy of Ultimate Vocabulary sold through this link, Ultimate Vocabulary will give us part of the sale price, which will help us maintain this site.

Here are some authentic, unconsciously humorous definitions by school children:

Acrimony: what a man gives his divorced wife

Adult: a man that has stopped growing at both ends but not in the middle

Anatomy: the study of heavenly bodies

Animal husbandry: the act of having more than one husband at the same time

Artichoke: an ancient instrument of torture

Celibate: one who cleans out cellars

Facetious: a term used to denote the followers of Mussolini

Federal Reserve: a reserve where federal employees hunt wild game

Incinerator: a person who hints bad things instead of coming right out and telling you

Inertia: the state of being abreast

Laxity: a cure for constipation

Manoeuvre: what they put on grass. We have manoeuvre on our lawn.

Oasis: a sea-monster with long tenacles that crawls around on the bottom of the sea

Ostracise: when an ostrich sticks his head in the sand when he thinks someone is coming

Philanthropist: one who has the power of throwing his voice

Seminary: a place where they bury the dead

Strategy: when you don’t let the enemy know that you are out of ammunition, but keep on firing

Syntax: all the money collected by the Catholic church from sinners

Thrombosis: an instrument used in a jazz band

Truancy: something which has been proved to be true

Turquoise: like a turtle and moves very slow

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