Funny English Errors Rap Song

We thought it would be fun to make a rap video to honour Funny English Errors and Insights — Illustrated. So we commissioned professional filmmaker Brian Mitolo and performer rapper Ziy to create a YouTube rap video.

Here are the song's lyrics.

The Funny English Errors Rap Song

Intro
So English gives you difficulty?
You ought to know you’re in great company.
Hear these howlers to assuage your anguish:
Find the funny side to the English language.

Verse 1
“Define the first person”, our teacher requested;
“Adam” was the answer she least expected.
In our classroom, “to punctuate” means,
To make a hole in somebody’s jeans.
And “Parts of speech” aren’t verbs or nouns,
But the vocal chords that make the sounds.

Chorus
Howlers, clangers,
boners, bloopers.
Flubs, fluffs, gaffes, breaks,
blunders, bloomers.
Call them what your fancy dictates,
Everyone makes funny English mistakes.

Verse 2
What’s a “metaphor”? We had no clue;
Someone said it’s a thing that you can shout through.
Somebody else said, without missing a beat,
“A conjunction’s” a place where rail lines meet.
If it’s more than one “mouse,” you’ve got “mice”,
So the plural of “spouse” must be “spice”.

Chorus
Howlers, clangers,
boners, bloopers.
Flubs, fluffs, gaffes, breaks,
blunders, bloomers.
Call them what your fancy dictates,
Everyone makes funny English mistakes.

Verse 3
A “collective noun” is a garbage can.
An “epigram’s” a settler from old England.
A “relative pronoun’s” a mother or a brother.
A “verb”’s what you eat — or something or other.
The future tense of "I give" is "You take".
When someone’s got yours it’s the possessive case.

Chorus
Howlers, clangers,
boners, bloopers.
Flubs, fluffs, gaffes, breaks,
blunders, bloomers.
Call them what your fancy dictates,
Everyone makes funny English mistakes.

Verse 4
The feminine of Czar must be sardine.
And the feminine of manager? Menagerie.
When the teacher asked how long babies should be fed,
“The same as short ones”, is what we said.

Chorus
Howlers, clangers,
boners, bloopers.
Flubs, fluffs, gaffes, breaks,
blunders, bloomers.
Call them what your fancy dictates,
Everyone makes funny English mistakes.

Chorus, repeated
Howlers, clangers,
boners, bloopers.
Flubs, fluffs, gaffes, breaks,
blunders, bloomers.
Call them what your fancy dictates,
Everyone makes funny English mistakes.

Outro
Remember that for every mistake you make,
A teacher has failed to communicate.
So here is a tip for teaching well,
If you’re going to teach, you better show and tell.