More Handpicked Howlers
More Handpicked Howlers
This page contains a selection of howlers from Cecil Hunt's classic book of More Handpicked Howlers, published in 1938. The selected extracts, edited and rearranged, are reproduced for readers in countries where More Handpicked Howlers is in the public domain, which includes Australia. For other countries, please check your local copyright laws.
As we were going back to school next day we got our clothes ready for the mourning.
In our school are half girls.
On her hat she wears the school monologue.
I lay stretched in a gondola on the canal, drinking it all in. Life never seemed so full before.
He called his wife darling and other superfluous names.
Once accepted by the corporation you become a stationary employee.
The woman had her face lifted by a drastic surgeon.
In this country you have to produce a certificate before you can prove you are born.
Unaware means the clothes we put on first.
Her mother, being immortal, had died.
August 27 was Confucius’s bathday.
The opposite of negative is photograph.
The results of the meeting did not come up to expectorations.
To be a good nurse you must be absolutely sterile.
Lingerie is another name for hanging about.
To exhort means to tire out—eg, he was exhorted.
A paradox is a cross between a parrot and a cow.
An artery is another name for picture-gallery.
My father put his foot on the exhilarator and the car was immediately exhilarated.
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