YOUR COMMENTS... +++ Ian F: "Cool site!" +++ Britto B: "Cool page. Love it." +++ Bill L: "You crack me up!" +++ Fahad: "Fantastic group. The best group in Facebook!" +++ Shafaq S: "Ha ha ha, very funny" +++ Radika D: "This is cool... since my English full of errors :))" +++ Tracy N: "So useful and so funny!" +++ Samantha S: "I just love the many funny posts on this site :)" +++ Nie A: "Me too!" +++ Joanne B: "This page is so funny, keep it up" +++ Andrea T: "What a sense of humour we have. Love it." +++ Kara M: "He he, great site!" +++ Mike H: "Awesome site!" +++ Jubajo likes B25 (Sir Winston Churchill invented the V-sign to encourage people. It is different today): "Flip the fingers around and flip the message! Too funny!" +++ Loraine W likes B23 (Industrial revolution being special kind of pills to lazy people to make them work): "Absolutely adore this response. Only wish it were true! My 12 and 16 year old boys could do with a megadose." +++ Nicola D from Perth likes B44: "Funny as it is true ... Everyone I have showed it to has laughed. That's what makes a classic quote." +++ Virginia A from Brighton Qld likes B173 (Any one trespassing on these grounds, without permission, will be prosecuted): "LOL. Well, I mean, honestly: What is trespassing? Going on the grounds WITH permission?" +++ Phillip C from Mount Druitt NSW likes B21 (The King wore a scarlet robe trimmed with vermin): "It would have been a one of a kind robe. I wonder if it smelt?" +++ Barbara R likes B139 (For sale: Baker's business, good trade, large oven, present owner been in it 17 years. Satisfactory reasons for leaving): "Very good reason for leaving - 17 years in an oven. Well and truly baked!" +++ Gail D from WA likes B139 too: "Look out, the next generation of bakers will have to meet the challenges of business by putting their whole being into it!" +++ Sharon J likes B99 (Some women are pretty and some are teachers): "I just hope his teacher laughed!" +++ Karen W from Maitland NSW likes B94 (He tried in vain and was successful): "This cracked me up, it seems to be my motto for life or at least one I would strive to achieve." +++ Deb A likes B19 (B19 Columbus was a great navigator who cursed about the Atlantic): "The image of Columbus sailing around the Atlantic swearing away tickles me pink." +++ Cheryl D likes B68 (The earth holds on to everything with its grabity): "I've known men like that." +++ Gaye M likes B103 (No part of a cow is wasted; even the skin is used to put on the top of hot milk): "I will never look at a glass of milk in quite the same way. Milk and skin anyone?" +++ Diane G from Qld likes B142 (WANTED: A small pony belonging to a young lady with a silver mane and tail): "They do say that owners and their animals look alike and here is proof!" +++ Brooke S says "Absolutely hilarious... Loved reading it. Favourite would have to be the Wanted section. LOL funny." +++ Amanda S likes B66 (Gravity tells us why an apple does not go to heaven): "It is Isaac Newton's birthday today. I think he would have found it funny too!" +++ Chanteya says "B172 has to be my favourite hands down! 'Infringe our title to deceive the public'. Shameless but brilliant!" +++ Dianne M says "'Henry the Navigator sent out many navel expeditions to explore the lower regions'. What a difference an E makes!" +++ Melissa C says "B41 is a cute one: 'A curve is the longest way between 2 points'." +++ Deb D says she would use the news headline "Judge Dismisses Most Charges In Apple Suit" as "an example in junior English classes to highlight the importance of using correct language to convey a message" +++ Maneeha says "'Industrial Revolution is a special kind of pills which doctors give to lazy people to make them work'... I love this! :D" +++ Selena Z likes "A triangle is a square with only 3 corners." +++ Allen S likes "'An example of a collective noun is a garbage can' ... It plays on several levels." +++ T Phan from Qld: "'A verb is something to eat'. So funny when reading it. I guess a verb is similar to a herb?! :)" +++ Cheryl M: "When I read the following one, I truly broke out laughing ... 'James the First claimed the throne of England through his grandmother because he had no father'". +++ Katherine R from Qld says blooper number B14 "made me laugh out loud: 'In Russia there are vast carnivorous forests' ... Imagining this made me smirk for the rest of the afternoon". +++ Shane S from Australia also likes B14, adding: "The setting for the fourth installment of the Twilight movie series?" +++ Lorna S from VIC says she remembers interviewing a guy who proudly stated on his CV that he had been "ducks of his school" +++ Julia R likes "Proportional Representation is a system of voting always favoured by those who can’t get in otherwise" +++ Adrian G from Qld says "My favourite funny English error is b37. I am sure it is not the answer being looked for, but how can you argue with the logic!" +++ Joni H from NZ likes "A triangle is a square with only three corners" +++ Trina H from Australia: "I like 'In the Classroom: Vocabulary' where it says stars are the moon's eggs. I teach children and they would really think this!" +++ Selena Z says her Mum would love this howler: "Dear Mum, I could have eaten a dead monkey, so your cake came in very useful." +++ Jessica W says "My fav is 'Weight is the weight that a thing weighs'" +++ Raylee L says about this site: "Hilarious. I love it." +++ Liz J from NZ: "I like the press errors" +++ Sonia K from NSW: "B7 is my favourite. As a geography teacher I love it and can't wait to share it with my students." +++ Frances A from NZ: "My favourite is 'A criminal is someone who gets caught'; there are those who truly believe this!" +++ K Hill's favourite howler is "An island is a portion of land entirely surrounded by water except in the middle"; K Hill adds: "As a student teacher who's been informed 'Tasmania cannot possibly be an island because it's part of Australia', I would rejoice to hear this response!" +++ Veronica D likes "LOST: A small pony belonging to a young lady with a silver mane and tail"; Veronica says "As soon as I read this one I got an immediate visual image." +++ Shasi's favourite is "The imperfect tense is used in France to express a future action in past time which does not take place at all"; Shasi says "Like how I'm my own grandfather; trippy, confusing, hilarious." +++

Philosophical Sayings

Hunt's Latest Howlers—Philosophical Sayings

This page contains a selection of howlers relating to philosophy from Cecil Hunt's classic book of Latest Howlers, published in 1934. The selected extracts, edited and rearranged, are reproduced for readers in countries where Latest Howlers is in the public domain, which includes Australia. For other countries, please check your local copyright laws.

Paradise is what happens when your arm goes stiff.

Chivalry is the attitude of a man towards a strange woman.

My aunt takes in weakly boarders.

If you eat too many melons you get melancholic.

Composition is the art of bringing loose ideas into a complication.

When a man has a wife and has got another living he is said to have committed boycott.

A Proper Noun is the name we give to a thing which is ours or which we intend is going to be ours when it is not.

An undergraduate is a person not up to the mark.

A career is the seat at the back of a man's bicycle.

A manager is a man who watches other men work.

Peace means when you have got a bit of cake or pudding.

An insult is when somebody tells you what you ought to know but isn't pleasant.

You can learn many lessons from Caesar. He made a speech from his golden chair and when he had finished his friends killed him.

A Pacifist is a person who has been over the Pacific ocean.

A bachelor is a rich man. They are always bald.

A miracle is a thing no man can do except the person who does it.

It is not wise to accumulate with people until you know them properly.

A man is qualified for the dole when he does not feel like work any more until he is not allowed to have any more dole any longer.

My father used to be a sailor but now he works.

Aristocrats are public performers. Those who show them have to have a licence.

Divorce suits are special clothes worn when the wedding is all over.

Schoolmasters ought to go home after school, then we should not get tired of their faces.

Single misfortunes never come alone: the greatest possible misfortune is often followed by something a great deal worse.

Schoolmasters are human beings the same as anyone else, and they should not be despised.

Concentration means putting all your brains in one spot and not allowing them to stray to things that look very nice.

If you matriculate properly you can be sure of a good digestion when you get older.

A manor house is where they teach people manners. They don't build them now.

Anyone doing the least bit of murder can now be taken to prison by the police.

A crisis is a thing which hangs up in the winter and comes down in the summer as a butterfly.

A man who reaches a hundred is called a centipede.

It is a very serious handicap to be without one's liver.

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