Ho Hum: Newsbreaks from The New Yorker

Ho Hum: Newsbreaks from "The New Yorker" was published in 1931. According to the book's blurb, the book is a collection of "four hundred matters of regret — things for which people have been sorry afterward". It is a collection of "small oddments, sediments, and surprises that have been scattered through the pages of The New Yorker like daisies in a field — the comical and unbelievable little paragraphs called 'newsbreaks', the slips of eager pen and unwieldy linotype".

Here is a selection of the best "news breaks" from the collection. We have included a citation to the source that originally published the news break. If you want to find the original item yourself, you might try The Newspaper Article Archive or GenealogyBank.

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Erratum: We regret to state that we did not have the information about John Ehrlich correct. He is not an instructor, but just a fellow. Dr Wolf is not head of the botany department. There is no botany department, it's in biology. It's not Durham University, but Duke University at Durham, North Carolina.

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For sale: We have the same eggs for sale that we had last winter. Come and see us.

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Headline: Medina To Have Parent-Teacher Assassination

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Short story: Rushing to her room Louise dressed in paste and joined him in his car. Neither of them spoke.

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Headline: New Sultan of Morocco Entitled to Four Wives; Prefers Mahogany

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Editorial: In many ways, Pennsylvania is unlike Italy

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Three bandits held up WS Bagley, his wife, and mother-in-law in the garbage of their home

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The minister said that the church widows were a disgrace to the parish and it was time somebody washed them.

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Work wanted: Gent's laundry taken home. Or serve at parties at night.

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Miss Brice, sometimes spoken of as "the funniest woman on earth", seemed taken aback. Finally she gave the monosyllabic answer, "actress".

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Headline: Boy Is Missing In First Pair Of Long Pants

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One day, quite suddenly as is the way of those things, he fell from an airplane

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Headline: Night Club Queen Turns To Smelling Salts At Her Trial

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Miss Dorothy Morrison, who was injured by a fall from a horse last week, is in St Joseph's hospital and covered sufficiently to see her friends

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The headline results of a horse race: La Paloma, 8-to-1, Passes Buttered Toast At Fair Grounds