Reviews of Funny English Errors and Insights

The following independent reviews of Funny English Errors and Insights: Illustrated have been published:

• Lyn Mills, "Tripping Up On Language: Funny English", The Canberra Times (Times 2), 4 November 2010, 7 ((c) Canberra Times, reproduced with permission)

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• Fred McArdle, "Funny English Errors and Insights (Book Review)" (Dec 2010) Teacher: The National Education Magazine 72 (reproduced with permission)

‘Hilarious’ may be the best word for this book. Lawyer and contributor to Ed Serenson’s Write Better English website Troy Simpson has collected 301 ‘uses and misuses of written English’ for the entertainment and, ahem, instruction of readers. If you’re seeking a good Christmas gift, this would fit the bill perfectly.

Funny English Errors and Insights is a collection of howlers and other odd uses of language, under several headings, such as Geography, History, Religion and Society, and, of course, Miscellaneous. These are mainly from student essays, but there is another section called ‘In the Press,’ which borrows from the news and public notices sections of our illustrious media.

I suspect that Simpson has had a joyful experience selecting the items chosen for this little book. According to the Write Better English website, he ‘sifted through 120,000 images to find 30 photographs that cleverly convey the humour in the funny misstatements.’ He’s not alone in his enjoyment, apparently: according to the Write Better English website, as at 12 October 2010, this book was Australia’s top pre-order in humour at one of the top booksellers and one of that distributor’s top-10 bestsellers across all categories.

It’s the sort of book you can open at any page and begin laughing. In fact, when I showed it to my family, there was an instant outbreak of helpless laughter. Try to read out an item and it’s often difficult to finish, because of paroxysms of laughter. I was at once reminded of some of Denys Parsons’s books of the 1950s and ’60s, like It Must Be True: Classic newspaper howlers, bloopers and misprints, which were very similarly exhausting to read, being extremely funny, although I think quite authentic. It could be said that if this is in the tradition of Parsons’s collection, it’s a very valuable contribution to the genre.

As laughter is the best medicine, this book could almost be claimed on Medicare, although one might be distracted by a sense of sympathy for the authors of the various pieces. For example, number 172: The masculine of doe is bread. Or number 86: The Natural Sciences are: Byosophy, Histeria, Geomaphy, Cystonemy, Asstonemy, Cemetary and two others. A reader will perceive a sense of panic, surely.

Speaking of sense, did you know that The five senses, number 87, are asleep, awake, conscious, unconscious and dead? This gives some understanding of the author’s claim, on page v of the foreword – well worth reading, by the way – that many of the ‘glaring blunders’ in this book show wonderful imagination. Some even display genius, albeit accidental.’

A reader’s initial reaction to many of the items might well be, ‘Eh? Come again?’ where there seems to be logic, but it demands to be instantly re-read. For example, number 62, An angle is a triangle with only two sides, or, number 65, Q: Take five away from 87 as many times as you can. What is the result? A: I get 82 every time. One might well visualise the puzzled expression on the child’s face as he or she asks, ‘Isn’t that what you asked me?’ And number 66 seems like a perfect example of an imaginative response – Q: How would you divide four potatoes equally among five persons? A: Mash them. Obviously the teacher is thinking fractions, but the child is thinking real life.

My personal favourites are the ones where one letter typographical error gives a vastly different image from the one intended, such as number 164: The ground was very wet and all the players were soaping, or number 205: The intruder was cornered by a polite dog. My very favourite is number 226: An incident of an extraordinary nature befell the Colonel while playing a golf match. A large grey cow swooped down, picked up his ball and flew away with it. Extraordinary? Very. Just picture it!

Spread through the book are well-chosen illustrations, all photographs from the National Library of Australia’s Picture Collection. Usually they have the effect of enhancing the humour of the item.

Funny English Errors and Insights is a laugh-out-loud book, but it also has educational uses and would be a lot of fun in class. I would suggest it would be best enjoyed in company anyway, partly because it’s a joy to share and partly because if you find yourself unable to continue reading aloud one item, you can just hand the book over to another person to finish it for you. And there may be some items that must be seen rather than heard, for example, number 170: Period costumes are dresses all covered with dots. Why? you might ask. Just buy the book and look at the picture, and all will become clear.

One of the things a reader may discover is that this book should never be lent to friends, because if they fail to return it, the friendship may be at risk. This is the kind of book of whose position on a home bookshelf its owner is probably always aware. Possibly a good solution would be to buy two or three, as insurance.

Fred McArdle is a regular reviewer for Teacher.